Guess it'd help if I LINKED to the new blog, wouldn't it?

Geez, I'm retarded.

Here it is: http://aintitcruel.blogspot.com/

Update your bookmarks and all that good stuff. I'll eventually integrate the blog into another URL (maybe I'll buy AintItCruel.com...again) if I can ever figure out what FTP is and how I utilize it. Anyone out there that's smarter than me wanna help?

I've got myself a new blog/journal/waste of time over at Blogger. After checking out the various features, I decided that, well, it's better than LiveJournal. And now that my work schedule has changed back to something more tolerable, I'll actually be able to give fresh content!

I can hear you all shouting for joy now, I really can.

But, the ol' LiveJournal is still going to be around (linked on the new site) for, well, basically for the same thing that it was used for on my last two posts (before this 'un). That's right! Crappy quizzes and surveys!

Farewell and adieu.

During the nine minutes between the time that I hit the snooze button and the time that my alarm goes off for the second time in the morning, I had a dream. I dreamt that I was at the mall. Nothing out of the oridinary, really. I'm always at the mall. You could almost call me a mallrat except for the fact that I actually spend money at the mall. Which is why I'm always broke but stylin'.

I'm getting off subject.

Anyways, in the dream, I was at the mall and I was walking towards the parking garage (specifically, passing Hot Topic) when who do I see before me? Bill Cosby. Only Mr. Cosby is dressed like Cliff Huxtable when he's just gotten out of bed. You know, bedroom shoes, shorts and a v-neck undershirt (seriously, I used to watch The Cosby Show a LOT). I wanted to go talk to him but at the same time didn't want to draw attention to him, as if Bill Cosby walking through the mall in his jammie wasn't going to draw attention of its own.

So I decided to do it anyway and just go introduce myself to him. No autograph hounding, none of that. Just wanted to say "Hi." So I did, and as I walk up to him, about to shake his hand, Mr. Cosby lights up a cigarette.

I was apalled. Bill Cosby doesn't smoke! I thought. He just eats pudding! The worst part was, the mall is completely smoke free - no smoking of any kind allowed indoors. And somebody should've told this to Mr. Cosby. But, it sure wasn't going to be me. I mean, this is Bill Cosby, for God's sake!

My alarm went off again and I woke up.

I really shouldn't be here right now. I should be, probably, in my car and on the way back from Columbia.

But I'm not. Obviously.

You see, there was a Jimmy Buffett concert in Columbia tonight and I had tickets. VERY good tickets. I'd made it a point to get the tickets on opening day because (a) they would've sold out otherwise and (b) I'd have ended up paying a crapload for 'em on eBay. But then, work got involved.

You see, I passed my certification at work which means, yay, I'm moving to another position and well on my way to another raise. Well, the training for this new position was supposed to be this week. And, being a 4-day training period, the final assessment would've been today. So obviously, I couldn't have missed work to go to a Jimmy Buffett concert.

And then the training got moved back until May 10th. Unfortunately, by the time I found that out (day before yesterday), I'd already concluded that I wasn't going to be able to go to Buffett and sold my ticket to somebody else. So, instead of going to Columbia, seeing Jimmy Buffett and having one of the most fun times I could possibly have, what'd I do? I stayed at home and watched Drunken Master by myself.

Sad, ain't it?

Remember how back when The Matrix Reloaded was released, people accused the big Burly Brawl fight scene between Neo and about 100 Agent Smiths as looking too much like a video game? Well, as it turns out, they were right.

From IMDb:

Troy director Wolfgang Petersen was unconcerned when Brad Pitt tore his Achilles' tendon whilst filming the lavish new epic - because he was so confident about the movie. Pitt was out of action for weeks while he recovered from the injury, but Petersen refused to worry about the lost time and money on the $185 million , because he was convinced he was making a classic film...

Am I the only one that sees the irony in this?

And pirates. 'Nuff said.

I loved Kill Bill Vol. 1. Not liked. LOVED. Quentin Tarantino is, in my opinion, one of the most original, most exciting directors working today.

Original, you ask? How can he be original when the entirety of Kill Bill is nothing but one homage after another to the films that he grew up on? It's original because, while paying homage from these old films, he's turned out a film that is absolutely and without a doubt his own. The Bride wears a jump suit like Bruce Lee in Game of Death? The showdown with O-Ren Ishii is straight out of Lady Snowblood? Who cares? The fact remains that these are still Tarantino characters and they're living Tarantino lives in a Tarantino world.

That's what I love about his movies. They don't even pretend to exist in the same world as the rest of us. Tarantino's dialogue is some of the best that's ever been written, yet it consists of things that normal people, in most situations, would never say. At least, not in the words that Tarantino uses. It's a strange, heightened-geek speak. And it'd be out of place in anyone else's film.

With that being said, Kill Bill Vol. 1 didn't have much of the classic Tarantino dialogue and the character quirks that we're used to. But Kill Bill Vol. 2 was full of it.

Vol. 2 is, in my opinion, the greater of the two halves. As much as I loved Vol. 1 and as much fun as it was, I still prefer Vol. 2. Sure, I missed the great stuff with O-Ren Ishii and the great showdown with the Crazy 88s and the awesome anime sequence, but in their place I got some of the coolest Tarantino scenes that I've ever seen.

Where Vol. 1 was an homage to the Hong Kong martial arts flicks of the 70s, Vol. 2 pays more homage to the Sergio Leone-style spaghetti Westerns that shaped Tarantino's encyclopedic mind.

The first Chapter of Vol. 2 gives us a great, long dialogue sequence between Bill and The Bride that explains the depth and, let's face it, weirdness of their relationship. Later on in the film, David Carradine, as Bill, gives a speech about Superman that's probably one of the best monologues that QT has ever written. And coming from David Carradine's mouth makes it that much better.

Don't get me wrong -- it's not all chatter. This is still Tarantino's "action movie." The best, and longest, action sequence in the movie is a battle of the Amazons -- Uma and Darryl -- inside the tiny confines of a single-wide trailer. It's one of the best sequences out of either Volume, and it concludes perfectly.

Speaking of perfect endings... The end of Vol. 2 couldn't be any better. I honestly couldn't think of a single way that the ending of this epic saga could be any better than it was. The final confrontation between Bill and The Bride isn't a ball-to-the-wall action sequence or dual like most filmmakers would have given us. It's more real than that. It's about two people who've had a serious and deep relationship having to come to terms with the fact that, well, things change, especially when you're a murderous bastard.

I loved the movie. Kill Bill, as a whole, is Tarantino's best work. And that's saying a lot coming from a guy who puts Pulp Fiction in his Top 3 favorite films EVER. In a way, I'm glad that the movie was split up into two parts because, although there's a lot of fat, a lot of scenes that could've been cut and not affected the plot a single bit (the scene with Budd and his boss at the strip club comes to mind), the kind of fat that Tarantino gives us is still classic.

And then there's the part of me who'd love to see the film as one long, four-hour epic. And, according to some things that Tarantino has said, I might just get my wish. He's wanting to edit the two together as one film to receive a limited arthouse release later this year. At any rate, even if that doesn't happen, there's a reason that I've got a multi-disc DVD player. It's not as useless as one might think.

Oh, and one more thing: Michael Madsen is the man. Even in Free Willy.

[Edit: I was reading Roger Ebert's review of the film today and he mentioned that Pai Mei's voice was dubbed in English by Tarantino. This is something that I'd heard was going to happen all during the filming of the movie. But when I saw the movie, Pai Mei spoke in Mandarin, with English subtitles. Are there two versions of the film out there? If anyone else sees it, please tell me what this sequence was like on the print that you saw.]

From CHUD.com:

I gotta admit I didn't think much of House of 1000 Corpses, which seemed to be little more than clever genre casting and experimentation with filters. That said, I do think writer-director-composer Rob Zombie has plenty of visual flair as a director, but really needs a decent script (the one for Corpses was probably scrawled on an empty beer carton) to help realize his potential on the impending sequel, The Devil's Rejects.

Then again, adding #1 zombie crusher Ken Foree to the cast of horrorheads can't hurt. The Dawn of the Dead survivor will apparently be playing a relative of Sid Haig's Captain Spaulding, pretty much the only character from the original flick I found interesting. Spaulding will also now be hanging out with The Hills Have Eyes mutant Michael Berryman, who also doesn't get nearly enough work these days.

The new chapter reportedly follows a group of bounty hunters, led by a previous victim's brother, chasing the family of wackos from Corpses. All the familiar freaky faces from the original will return for the Lion's Gate sequel, including Karen Black, Bill Moseley, and Mrs. Zombie herself Sherri Moon.

This is very, very awesome news. First of all, I knew that Rob Zombie wasn't going with some stupid title like House of 1000 Corpses Part 2 or House of 2000 Corpses, but I didn't know that there was actually a title for the movie. The Devil's Rejects. What a great title.

Also, the article speaks of it like it's old news, but I had no idea that Michael Berryman was going to be in the movie! Michael Berryman! Do you know how freakin' cool that is?!

But the best news of all is that Ken Foree is in the movie. I didn't know the guy was even working in movies now. In all honesty, I think the only movie I've seen him in IS Dawn of the Dead (and this is the original that we're talking about here, not the new "reimagining"). But, then I got to thinking? How could he possibly be related to Captain Spaulding? I mean, half-brother maybe, but still...that's stretching it. This is almost as confusing as when I heard that Chalie's Angels: Full Throttle was going to cast Bernie Mac as Bill Murray's brother. Almost.

Kill Bill Vol. 2 is the shizzie. Here's a survey thing.

( click here for the Longest Survey in History )

Today sucked. Big time.

First, I felt like crap. I was out of work yesterday because I felt like crap. (Three days of moving, while being sick -- and feeling like crap -- will do that to a person.) But today I felt a little less like crap than I did yesterday so I went to work.

And when I left the house, the weather sucked. Not only was it 46 degrees -- in the middle of April!!! -- but it was pouring down rain, and I got my new suede shoes wet. Then I realized that my new house key didn't work, so I wasn't able to lock the door. I begrudgingly went to the car anyway, with chubby rain hitting be in the back, and went to work.

And work sucked. I felt like crap, my throat hurt (very bad when your job involves talking for eight hours straight) and around 10am, I felt the first hint of a headache. A bad headache. The kind I always get when we've got this kind of weather. A bloody migraine. And what made it better? The fact that I was completely out of Excedrin and there was no headache medicine to be found anywhere. So I sat, staring at a computer screen and talking to retarded people on the phone while my head was pounding. I think I'd have been better off without it.

And then, to my surprise, I found out that I failed my certification test. That doesn't mean anything to any of you, I know. But put simply: getting certified in the job I'm doing now means two things: 1) a $1.00 per hour raise, and 2) a promotion to the next level up, which subsequently leads to ANOTHER $1.00 per hour raise. Which is good. But I failed it. Which is bad.

So... the end of the day nears and I get a call at 5:54, about six minutes before I'm to get off of work. And it's a breeze. Easiest and quickest call that I'd had all day. I was excited. Even with a headache that made me want to pull my eyeballs out, I thought that maybe my day was going to turn around. The call ends at 5:59 and I'm happy. Done for the day. Just going to sit around for another minute because what are the chances of another call coming in this late in the--

Aw, crap.

My headpiece beeps, I answer. I look at the clock: 6:00pm on the dot. Crikey, what friggin' luck I've got. So I take the call -- and I'm none too happy about it -- and guess what? It ends up being one of the hardest calls that I could have possibly had. One of the most difficult AND one of the longest. I finally clock out at 6:15, the last one to leave for the day. I stumbled out, hardly able to walk straight my head is hurting so badly, and I head home (making a pit stop at Best Buy on the way).

(Oh! And I also got a memo today stating that my department will have extended hours -- until 9:30pm -- starting May 1st. There's reason #3 why I really, REALLY need to get certified and get that promotion.)

After I get home, I'm still sick as a dog. I walk in the door, go to the kitchen, grab some Excedrin, and swiftly proceed to puke it all up. Super.

Finally, my head started feeling better and after dinner, I sat down to watch my brand new Kill Bill Vol. 1 DVD. So at least my day ended well, because that movie RULES.

And then I remembered that I'd wanted to pick up the Kill Bill Vol. 2 soundtrack while I was at Best Buy but I was in such a state of brain-deadness, that I completely forgot. And that sucks.

Stole this from Chad. Does it work? Let's find out!!

J - Jealousy. [Unfortunately, this is right on the money.]
U - You feel like you have to equal up to people's standards. [Not necessarily. I just want to meet up to my own.]
S - You are very broad-minded. [Absolutely.]
T - You have an attitude, a big one. [Kiss my ass.]
I - You are always smiling & making others smile. [I try, though everyone gets in a bad mood now and then.]
N - You like to work, but you always want a break. [Right on. Especially the break part.]

( click here to find out your own name meaning )

Woah, Justin! Where've you been!?

I'm glad you asked. In addition to, you know, working the past week, I also unexpectedly moved to a new house.

Well, it was entirely unexpected. We've been shopping around for a new house for months now but the aquisition of this particular house just came all of a sudden. We never really had a time to even pack. Of course, that didn't really matter seeing as how the new house that we were moving to was a whopping 6/10 of a mile from the old house. So why'd we move. Simple: We just needed a bigger space. A MUCH bigger space.

It made moving a lot easier when we could simply load up the moving truck and glide down the street to the new house within a matter of minutes. And yet, it still took us three days to move everything. Including Easter Sunday. There was still so much to do by Sunday that we actually skipped church Sunday morning. Now, this has got to be the first time that I've ever missed an Easter Sunday at church and it was especially important to me this year because (a) it would have been the first Easter that I'd have spent at this church since I began attending and (b) my church moving into their new sanctuary this weekend, with Easter Sunday being the first service to be held there. I've been looking forward to this for some time now and very much expected to be there. But as I said, by Sunday, ther was still far too much moving left to do. Including a 10-year build-up of attic junk.

Living in this house -- the one I just moved from, I mean -- is the longest stretch of time that I've ever lived in one place. Leaving it wasn't sad though, really. I mean, I've been dying to move. And if you'd ever seen the size of my room in that house, combined with the amount of stuff that I had in it, you'd understand (seriously, I've seen closets bigger). But still, leaving the neighbors and everyone and the sheer familiarity of the place behind after such a long amount of time is still a bit strange.

Oh, who am I kidding? I went from a 10'x10' room to a 12'x24' one. Now I've got PLENTY of room to house my home theater, my DVD, book and toy collection -- with room to spare! Plus, I can now entertain and have seating room for more than 3 people AND those people can be comfortable because the body heat won't turn the space into a friggin' furnace.

So... movie night at Justin's house!

Also, wish me luck because I'm currently in the running for a writing gig at a big time internet movie website. I'm one of the top 10 finalists right now and that'll be reduced to a final five by next weekend. I'd rather not mention the site right now (in case I lose!!), but still. Wish me luck.

Please also wish me luck because, in the course of unpacking, I still haven't been able to find my razor. And my legs look terrible.

Best. Comic book movie. Ever.

(Extended review to come. Maybe.)

I don't know what the hell this is all about but I do know that it makes me laugh. And it makes me throw up a little. At the same time. Which is really quite a sensation -- you should try it sometime.

Have you ever just had "one of those days?" Today has most definitely been one of those days. I woke up in an ill mood to begin with. Then, I go to take a shower and I can't find any friggin' towels (luckily, they were all in the dryer). Then I realize -- oh crap! -- I still haven't gotten back to Greenville Tech about the tuition bill that they've sent me about the classes that I never took.

So I go to find the fax number where I'm to send my "formal complaint" and right next to it is... my property tax notice for my car. Which was due yesterday. Crap.

So I dig out an envelope and a stamp and have every intention of putting my tax check in the mail today -- regardless of the fact that, while I'm doing this, I'm wasting precious time that could be used driving to work. So I start to write the check...and screw it up. I put the wrong friggin' date and the wrong dollar amount. "No biggie," I think. I scratch VOID across the front of the check, rip it up and go to write another only to realize that--

That was my last check. In a fit of anger, I threw the empty check book into the backseat of my car. Like it was the checkbook's fault.

Then, I get to work and realize that I have absolutely no change to get any food out of the vending machine. No big deal if it wasn't for the fact that my lunch break isn't until 2:15 and I'm absolutely starving by noon. And nobody had change for a twenty. Then, I get what is without a doubt one of the worst phone calls I can get at my job, something that takes me forever to do and something that I hate doing.

So that's how my day started. How was yours?

Oh! And I didn't have a single chance to pull a single April Fool's Day prank on a single person. Which really makes me sad.

Good news: Once I eventually did get change after buying my lunch, I put a dollar into the vending machine to get some Certs (bad news: it gave me "Mixed Fruit" flavored Certs -- what's the point of that?!) and it gave me a Buffalo Nickel with my change. Which is kinda neat, but I think I lost it already.

I'm trying to waste time (though I should be in bed) while I rip a couple of CDs. So I figured...hey! I'll write a journal entry! Then I'm all like, woah, I have nothing to talk about. Then I'm like, hey! I'll do a meme.

So here it is.

( click here for the mofuttin' meme )